Maine murder-suicide that killed couple is 3rd domestic murder in same family since 2010

NEW SHARON, Maine — A Maine woman who lost her parents in a murder-suicide three years ago was found dead last week alongside her longtime partner, who authorities say fatally shot her and then himself.

Jessica Dapolito, 42, is also the third woman in the family to be slain by a spouse since 2010.

Maine state troopers found Dapolito and her husband, Robert Dapolito, 55, dead Jan. 25 after they were asked to conduct a welfare check at the couple’s home in New Sharon, Maine State Police officials said. The Office of the Chief Medical Examiner found that both had died of gunshot wounds.

Evidence indicated that Robert Dapolito was the gunman, authorities said. The motive for the murder-suicide was unclear.

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LenaMarie Tufano, who created a GoFundMe page to help the couple’s two sons, Patrick Dapolito and Casey Ordway, pay for their funeral arrangements, wrote that the tragedy came as a shock to those who knew the couple.

“Patrick and Casey’s (lives) were upturned that day,” she wrote.

Besides their sons, the couple leave behind a beloved Newfoundland, Athena, and a toddler grandson, Liam, who is Tufano’s son.

On January 25th, 2021 our lives changed forever. We lost two of the few important people in ours live and gained another...

Posted by LenaMarie Tufano on Tuesday, January 26, 2021

“My heart aches knowing that he will never be able to remember his Papa B and Nonna J,” Tufano wrote of her son on Facebook. “My heart aches for when the time comes when he starts to ask us about them because he has pictures of them in his family book, and we have to explain to him what happened.”

If you or someone you know is suffering from domestic abuse, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233), TTY 1-800-787-3224, or chat live at thehotline.org.

A trail of tragedy

While the murder-suicide delivered a shock to the couple’s loved ones, it is not the first time their family has dealt with such a tragedy. Jessica Dapolito lost her parents, Thomas and Michelle Masse, to a murder-suicide in 2018.

Thomas Masse, 60, of Temple, shot and killed his 59-year-old wife on Jan. 9, 2018, before turning the gun on himself. The Bangor Daily News reported that Masse called 911 about 5:50 a.m. that day and told a dispatcher he was going to kill himself.

The call prompted a Franklin County sheriff’s deputy and a Farmington police officer to rush to the couple’s home. When they arrived about 10 minutes after the call, they repeatedly attempted to contact the Masses inside the house, with no luck.

Like the shooting that killed the Dapolitos, the Masse murder-suicide came as a shock to all who knew them. Tom Masse worked as an auto mechanic, and his wife was a motel manager after working as a communications coordinator at the University of New England.

“Tom was a funny and loving husband, father and grandfather, Michelle a loving mother and grandmother,” their joint obituary read.

Tactical teams entered the home around 12:30 p.m. and found the couple, the Daily News reported. Michelle Masse’s body was in a bathtub, while Thomas Masse was seated in a chair in the living room, a pistol by his side.

The family’s violent tragedies were not relegated to Jessica Dapolito’s side of the family. Robert Dapolito’s brother, Patrick Dapolito, is serving a 55-year prison sentence for killing his wife in 2010.

Patrick Dapolito, then 39, fatally shot his wife, Kelly Winslow-Dapolito, 30, on the bathroom floor of their Limington home March 16, 2010. The Associated Press reported at the time that Dapolito reported Winslow-Dapolito missing two days later.

Her body was later found on a wooded property owned by the Dapolito brothers’ parents in Upton, near the Maine-New Hampshire border. The older Dapolitos lived there but were vacationing in Florida at the time, authorities said.

Prosecutors at Patrick Dapolito’s 2012 murder trial argued that he shot Winslow-Dapolito in the head as they lay on the floor following a night of binging on cocaine and prescription painkillers. The couple, who had been married about six months, had a history of domestic violence.

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Patrick Dapolito initially claimed that his gun went off accidentally. Later, he claimed that his wife had been killed by drug dealers.

After killing her, he wrapped Winslow-Dapolito’s body in a blanket and plastic and stored it in a basement freezer so his 13-year-old daughter would not see it when she came home from school, court records said.

He kept the body in the freezer until he was ready to move it to his parents’ property in Upton. According to documents, Patrick Dapolito borrowed his brother’s truck to move his slain wife’s body.

“Dapolito said he spent the next several minutes talking to Kelly Winslow telling her he would be back to get her in a few days,’' an arrest affidavit said. “He stated he also prayed and cried during this time.’'

Patrick Dapolito, now 50, is serving his prison sentence at the Maine Correctional Center in Windham.

‘They impacted a lot of kids’ lives’

It was uncertain Tuesday what impact Kelly Winslow-Dapolito’s killing, along with the murder-suicide of his wife’s parents, ultimately had on Robert Dapolito. He professed belief in his brother’s innocence in a Facebook post dated Jan. 23, 2012, the day before testimony began in Patrick Dapolito’s murder trial.

“Pat, you are my brother and believe you are innocent of these hideous charges, and those that believe differently don’t know you,” Robert Dapolito wrote. “To all the haters and non-believers, they may as well delete me from their profile, as well as yours. I love you and can’t wait till you are with us again. Dunkin and McDs on me.

“I love you, stay strong, and know your family is behind you. You will be vindicated soon.”

He did not post anything publicly about the case after his brother’s conviction.

Domestic violence experts indicate that instances of multiple domestic violence killings in a single extended family are rare.

“I haven’t seen that many times,” Regina Rooney, of the Maine Coalition to End Domestic Violence, told WGME in Portland. “What we see most often when we see, in this case, ‘femicide,’ the murder of a woman by her male partner, is that there is a context surrounding that homicide of coercive, controlling and oftentimes violent behavior leading up to it.”

Court records indicate that may have been the case with the Kelly Winslow-Dapolito murder, but no evidence of previous domestic violence in either of the other two cases has been made public.

Jessica Dapolito’s aunt told the Lewiston Sun Journal that her niece and Robert Dapolito were together for 23 years but never married. Jessica Dapolito took her partner’s last name along the way.

Both Jessica and Robert Dapolito did social work for Spurwink – Behavioral Health and Education Services, the aunt, Suzanne Bourque, told the newspaper. They managed the agency’s resident homes until about five years ago.

“They impacted a lot of kids’ lives,” Bourque said. “They did a lot of good work. It takes a special person to do that.”

The couple had since planned to start a business growing medical marijuana, she said.

Tufano described the couple, known as Bob and Jess, as lovers of the outdoors. Bob Dapolito loved motorcycles and his wife loved to garden.

“My son and future children will grow up with a love for the outdoors. A love for books. A love for four-wheeling and motorcycles,” Tufano wrote on Facebook. “In memory of them to start, I plan to start a garden with Liam this summer and every summer after that and make it the memorial garden. Jess had a green thumb and Bob had a knack of knowing how to do everything.

“I may not know how to do everything and I may definitely not have a green thumb, but I will try my damn hardest to garden with Liam like Bob and Jess did.”

Amanda Hayes, who responded to Tufano’s post, wrote that she was one of the children the Dapolitos welcomed into their home as she navigated the challenges of the foster care system.

“I lived with them most of my high school years, and I can remember how much love they filled a room with,” Hayes wrote. “They were always smiling and laughing.”

She recalled spending summer days by the pool and in the couple’s garden. They’d often end the day in the kitchen, where they would make pasta from scratch.

“Both Bob and Jess were people I looked up to and that I loved as if they were my own family,” Hayes wrote.

Jyssica Grover wrote that she worked with the couple, who she called “two of (her) favorite people (she’s) ever met.”

They adored their grandson, Grover told Tufano.

“Jess would show me pictures almost daily of what you had photographed and sent her or posted,” Grover wrote. “Liam was all those two talked about.

“I hope your family finds peace.”

Other friends also offered words of comfort.

“Bob and Jess left this world a better place than they found it,” Corey Jamison wrote. “Condolences to you and Patrick and the rest of your family.”

If you or someone you know is suffering from domestic abuse, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233), TTY 1-800-787-3224, or chat live at thehotline.org.

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